Withdrawal (from a person)

withdrawal from a person
is different from a
drug—it is the
scratch of a rusty
house key with the message
“bitch” in
pretty red letters but you’ve gotta
turn the key, sweetie, so
what’s left
for me to
unlock?
what’s left for me to
scratch up?

I know that there’s a
million secrets behind that door so
maybe if I scratch
the wood a little more—
then I’ll get my fix.

withdrawal from a person is
withdrawal from a man is
withdrawal from an idea is
withdrawal from
hands—

hands. yeah, they’re a
fitting symbol for the
man who used to hold
me:
a blanket, a weapon, a tool for writing
the most beautiful stories and the
most cutting
words.

nevermind i
changed my mind, i
think withdrawal from a person is,
in fact, just like a drug
in fact it is a drug, it’s
pills with

pretty little colors and
pretty little numbers and
pretty little names like
lexapro and Zoloft and
hydro-chloro-something—
just one more addiction to replace
the addiction you had to your father.

doctor says “take these and it’ll be
like he never even touched you.
like he never even loved you.
like he never even knew you.”
a rapid detox for the
worst of the worst that will take away
all the bad parts of you.

but tell me doctor,
what if the bad parts of me
are the only ones I’ve got?

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s