Angry iMessage Rant About Gender

This is all just copied and pasted directly out of my phone. My auto-capitalization is off and I really hate using punctuation, which is why this sounds kind of like a third grader wrote it. But I really want some other input on this. This post is probably gonna be 1000% stupid, honestly, but I’m just so frustrated. Please, people of the social justice world, don’t unfollow me in droves. If anything, hear me out and then tell me why I’m wrong 😉

look okay the thing is gender is a social construct so in actuality it doesn’t REALLY exist at all. but that could also apply to a lot of things like math or time or whatever. I think everyone should just do whatever the fuck they want and be whatever the fuck they want and love whoever the fuck they want and just BE HUMAN BEINGS but while there’s bigots and hatred making it so that can never happen and that’s why labels are such a big deal to people. because if someone is being forced to label themselves they may as well pick one that they feel fits.

(I’m talking to a friend who says they feel like they’re bothered by people who are gender nonconforming and doesn’t really know why)

in my opinion the problem isn’t the fact that you’re bothered by it (or that anyone else is for that matter like as long as they keep their bother-ment to themselves) the problem comes in when people who feel, for whatever reason, like they’re not either gender are caused these massive amounts of anxiety because of it

like…I don’t know why people act the way that they act or feel the way that they feel

I like being a girl

I like being a human being but I also like being a girl

but everyone is ultimately just a human being and everyone should just be whoever the fuck they want to be and not make such a big deal about it

like I’ll use boy pronouns and girl pronouns and they/them pronouns if the people really want idgaf

but sometimes it just gets ridiculous and I want to be much more accepting than I am.

That was the point in the conversation where said that I have decided I am officially farm-gendered. My pronouns are hay bale and tractor. We kind of got off-topic after that.

And, yeah, I realize that the thing about the farm-gender was probably a completely asshole thing for me to say (although it was kinda funny) but…look, there are quite seriously people I know on tumblr who have decided that they identify as “planet” at that their pronouns are “sun” and “moon.” Maybe I’m a bigot for thinking that this shit is ridiculous (in which case someone needs to tell me that I am one and I’ll stop) but seriously, my peace and love and acceptance extends to people who label themselves as actual human fucking beings.

I don’t know why exactly I’m so upset over this. I’m sure that a lot of it has to do with period hormones and my general anxiety causing me to need something to freak out about. So someone, please, explain to me why I’m wrong. Or tell me that I’m right. Or explain to me how I’m neither. I just need someone to fucking explain. Like, how can someone identify as a planet??!!?!

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3 comments

  1. I think those people are either super spiritual (in a not exactly good way), OR are super into rejecting labels.

    I’ve had SO MANY people tell me that I “don’t need” labels and “shouldn’t label myself” and yadayada blahblahblah. But really, that’s how THEY feel, not how I feel. If that’s what works for them, just being human, then great. But I feel like being able to label myself as Androgynous and/or Gender Fluid (Nonconforming) helps me feel less alone and more understanding of myself.

    1. Thank you for your input.

      Basically where I find my own problem is that I would much rather everyone just be human and let it be (I also think everyone should just be a puppy or a unicorn with unlimited natural resources but that’s beside the point). But some people, such as yourself, obviously take a lot of comfort in their labels; some people are caused an extreme amount of anxiety by *not* having a label. So of course I’m going to use people’s labels and pronouns because I would never want to cause someone anxiety that way, but at the same time I just find it all so unnecessary.

      I don’t know if I’m even making sense. But again, thank you for your input.

      1. A lot of people find it unnecessary. I feel the same way about the whole “boy” or “girl” thing with kids. Why does it matter what my kid is? He’s human and he likes colors and toys — not just blue and trucks. And the people who reject labels get comfort out of just being human, which I totally respect and don’t use labels with them. Sometimes I wish I could be like that.

        But at the same time, before I identified as androgynous, before I was labeled with Bipolar disorder, etc., I felt extremely alone and frustrated because I seriously thought there was something wrong with everyone else in the world because I couldn’t relate to the average person. Once I found out there were labels that described me, I found community and information and was not only more able to relate to people, but I started to understand and love myself more. It’d be great if we could all live without labels, but for the people who just think they (or everyone else) is crazy, there is immense comfort and security in knowing you’re not alone. And without labels, how would we ever know?

        Just my view from my own personal experience.

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