“Yes, do whatever you want with your own body. You’re fully in control of it and any decisions you make regarding it are your own. But just be aware of the fact that you’re not always making the choice that you think you are. People are going to judge and exploit you in ways that you won’t even be able to imagine until it happens. So, yes, do whatever you want with your own body. But just be ready for the fallout because, hey, people suck sometimes.”
My mother gave me this piece of advice roughly a month ago, when my boyfriend and I got caught making out in the hallway so the entirety of my school administration subtly slut-shamed me. Seriously, my administration, for as long as anyone can remember, has been happily oblivious to people making out, smoking pot, beating the shit out of each other, and literally actually having sexual intercourse in the hallways. But the one time, the one fuckin time that I do something bad, it’s caught on tape for the world to see. If that isn’t bad luck then I don’t know what is.
It’s not like everyone started bullying me and calling me a slut to my face. In honesty, the incident wasn’t even on the radar of the majority of the airheads in my grade. I’m not very well-known and I managed to keep the whole incident quiet (at least I think I did). But my teachers, the security guards, and my freaking principals all knew. I sure as hell felt like a slut.
My “decision”? It wasn’t really a decision at all.